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  • Writer's pictureGenghis Gobi

Brain Draining in Idlibistan

Freinds and infidels!

While still waiting four you to sending me carrier pigeon, which I not understand why you not send yet, unless you eated poor bird, I thinked long and hardly about how to making Idlibistan grate again.

Four some timing i thinked about making and selling Make Idlibistan Grate Again cap. But then i have one two problem.

First is that Idlibistan never grate so makeing it grate again utterly nonsense! Then second is that even if I wanting to makeing cap I have problem that to makeing cap I need goat and if I had so much goat I not needing to make Idlibistan grate, weather firstly time or again!

Then I think I have solutioned. I can buying red MAGA cap cheap from disappointmented voters of Abu Donaldtrump al Twitteri and change message from MAGA to MIGA. Seem goodly idea, righteous? But when I trying, and I very trying when I want to, it disaster. You see what beheading knife tip did to MAGA cap:

You not pay goat four this, righteous?

Then I sudden had tremendously idea. Amerikastan gratest nation in historical of universe, righteous? It exceptionally? You asking any Abu or Umm al Amerikastani and he or she or zir (but not ver, pronoun ver haram in Muhaysinic Emirate of Idlibistan) will telling you so? Therefour it must being truly?

And what is most important feature of average Abu or Umm Amerikastani? Righteous! Feature is total, extremely ignorance! Ignorance of anything and everything! More ignorantly than rest of planet put together!

It obviously! Ignorance make Amerikastan grate!

So to makeing Idlibistan grate we must make ignorance! This logically!

Now problem is to create ignorance you not doing it overnight. It take century or more of effort. You must lying, falsification history, banning dissent, create trash media selling fantastic as news and also movie industry that replacement reality in people head! That still not enough! You must being destruction attention span so they not able to think about thing four more than fifteen second at time. This big problem! Even ISIS jihadi more intelligence and attention spanning than that! And we not have a century to wasting!

So now what to doing? You not worry, i dissolving problem in solution! Here it is:

All thought and attention from brain, righteous? If you not able to destruction intelligent of brain by control media and washing in Hollywood, you can still have same effective by removing brain itself! Just leave size of peanut so body keep functional.

It not difficult to doing. I already nominationed as Professor Emeritus of Neurosurgery at Department of Beheading at Idlibistan Institute of Muhaysinic Studies four pioneer of technical! In empty skull you can filling whatever rubbish you wanting!

And what to doing with removal brain? We not throwing it away, you belief me. No! We storage in jar just liking any other valuable resource!

Why it valuable resource, you asking? I tell you why:

Dear freind Abu Eliothiggins al Bellingcrapi information us that evil lefteous Nusayri pointy nose Assad regime planning to drop barrelbomb filling with new half naked Russia dictator Putin regime nervous agent Yesvichok on Idlibistan. As you may perhaps not be gnawing it immediate turning people into zombie.

And what zombie eating? Brain, righteous? So we giving zombie storage brain and they leaving people of Idlibistan alone!

Takebeer! Muhaysinihu Akbar! Soon proudly, we telling people of world: Idlibistan gratest in ignorant! Idlibistan more ignorant than you!

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